Knowledge Abounds: Quotes from Life of Kelsey Cook

Kelsey's Personal Tumblr!

Mon, 30 Jul 2012 18:00:24 -0400

"Come snort cocaine with me off this bathroom tile! I got my bell-bottoms on, I’m ready for a..."

Tue, 22 May 2012 01:00:51 -0400

“Come snort cocaine with me off this bathroom tile! I got my bell-bottoms on, I’m ready for a good time.”

- Kelsey Cook on the 1970’s

"You think the 90’s are alive in Portland? You should see France!"

Fri, 04 May 2012 19:58:28 -0400

“You think the 90’s are alive in Portland? You should see France!”

- Kelsey Cook

"And I wanna be an American! Where at least I can shoot things with guns"

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 01:34:20 -0400

“And I wanna be an American! Where at least I can shoot things with guns”

- Kelsey Cook

"If I were a villain I’d be Ursula"

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 01:59:43 -0400

“If I were a villain I’d be Ursula”

- Kelsey Cook

"Newsflash: Birds can’t leave the atmosphere"

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 00:35:06 -0400

“Newsflash: Birds can’t leave the atmosphere”

- Kelsey Cook

"Does someone have 20 dollars I can have? Because I need this Paula Deen “Hey..."

Mon, 12 Mar 2012 19:44:29 -0400

““Does someone have 20 dollars I can have? Because I need this Paula Deen “Hey Y’all” Keychain. It’s rhinestone””

- Kelsey Cook

Katie: I wanna see your peacock, cock cock, your peacock

Wed, 07 Mar 2012 03:17:40 -0500

Katie: I wanna see your peacock, cock cock, your peacock
Kelsey: That'll be 50 dollars please
Kelsey: Just kidding, more than that
Kelsey: This is at least a 75 dollar shlong.

"I don’t think we should buy local! I don’t care if we beat chickens and hormone-ize..."

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 00:54:24 -0500

“I don’t think we should buy local! I don’t care if we beat chickens and hormone-ize cows.”

- Kelsey Cook

Katie: What's the adjective to describe vagina-looking things? If phallic is for penis looking things...

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 20:51:00 -0500

Katie: What's the adjective to describe vagina-looking things? If phallic is for penis looking things...
Kelsey: Hole-y?

"STOP THE PRESSES! There was a Swan Princess 3?!?!"

Sat, 03 Mar 2012 20:55:34 -0500

““STOP THE PRESSES! There was a Swan Princess 3?!?!””

- Kelsey Cook

“I keep these in my wallet, so that when they find my body...

Fri, 02 Mar 2012 18:56:04 -0500

“I keep these in my wallet, so that when they find my body they will think I was sporty and adventurous”

"Look up the song Rasputin, it was made in the 70’s and sung by black people"

Fri, 02 Mar 2012 17:30:25 -0500

“Look up the song Rasputin, it was made in the 70’s and sung by black people”

- Kelsey Cook

"The only connection I have to a Lemon Meringue Pie is the shape of my head"

Thu, 01 Mar 2012 01:05:54 -0500

““The only connection I have to a Lemon Meringue Pie is the shape of my head””

- Kelsey Cook

"iCarly is definitely the reason I chose Seattle University."

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 20:31:36 -0500

“iCarly is definitely the reason I chose Seattle University.”

- Kelsey Cook

"I hate diversity! White power!"

Mon, 27 Feb 2012 03:11:29 -0500

“I hate diversity! White power!”

- Kelsey Cook

"(In response to KJ’s burp) “You are never getting married"

Mon, 27 Feb 2012 00:33:00 -0500

“(In response to KJ’s burp) “You are never getting married””

- Kelsey Cook

"Don’t have money for videogames for car trips? Tangle up some string then untie them!"

Mon, 27 Feb 2012 00:26:00 -0500

““Don’t have money for videogames for car trips? Tangle up some string then untie them!””

- Kelsey Cook

"Now just multiply that by math"

Mon, 27 Feb 2012 00:24:00 -0500

““Now just multiply that by math””

- Kelsey Cook

"It’s not gay if there’s a pillow in the way"

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 23:50:00 -0500

““It’s not gay if there’s a pillow in the way””

- Kelsey Cook